The Good, The Bad, and The Tawdry

The Good

The hotel in Denver is great. Our room has a living room and a bedroom with doors separating the two. The swimming pool is really clean and nice, and the hot tub is hot (a real plus when you've stopped traveling for the night). All in all, a great place.

The Bad

The air conditioner doesn't work.

This on Denver's hottest day of the summer. Now I know all our friends in San Antonio have absolutely no sympathy and I understand. However, I need it cold in the bedroom to sleep. Mae and I have a deal at home, the air conditioner doesn't go below 73 at night. Were it completely up to me, it would go as low as I could get it.

When we arrived I turned on the A/C, it's just one of those things I do. It worked, or so I found out later it only worked for a few minutes. So, it's getting time for bed, I go into the bedroom and it's hot. I fiddled with the thermostat and nothing. Called the desk and was told it was an energy-efficient a/c and that it measured the temperature outside, the temperature inside and blah blah blah. He said to turn up the thermostat a little and it would work. Bottom line; it was a complete cock and bull story. I went to bed and sweat until 12:30 when I got up and went to the front desk and talked to the bs'er and asked him if all the rooms had the "energy-efficient" a/c as did we. He said "yeah" in that tone of voice that told me I was keeping him from figuring out what flavor of gum was on the bottom of his shoe; and he didn't appreciate the interruption. I told him to cancel the next two nights reservations because I was unable to sleep. Once again the response had that similar tone. No "here let me get you a different room, or perhaps you might like a free box of miniature doggie biscuits (I'll let you decide if the biscuits were miniature, or the doggies).

So, I returned to the room and went to bed. At 2:30a.m. after sweatting another couple hours I phoned Expedia to cancel the next two nights because I figured if I didn't, I might not be reimbursed. After that phone call I was in a rare mood; one might even say mad as hell. Went back to bed and finally fell asleep at approximately 4:30.

Got up at 6:30 to get ready to pack up and get us hither to a different hotel. Now, I must let you know Mae is tired of packing and moving (and it's her birthday). So, as she's taking a shower, I lean into the bathroom and tell her I'm going to the front desk to see if this can be salvaged. Bottom line, the new person on the desk had some customer service blood flowing through her veins and within a couple hours we had a brand new a/c unit. Yay! Mae was happy, I was happy, and all is well. Oh, by the way, when I got up at 6:30 I vowed to be happy and not let this ruin the day...after we remember it's Mae's birthday. And according to Mae I was successful (which is really amazing because when confronted with lousy customer service, I can go on a tear and make everyone's life miserable).

The Tawdry

Now, I know this is the one that you're really interested in, but had to leave it to last.

Last evening (before the whole a/c incident), I'm outside smoking a cigar (ooops, forgot the setup).

The Setup

Our room is on the first floor at the end of a wing of the hotel, and there's an outside door that you can use, but need your key card to get into the building.

Back to The Tawdry

So, there I was smoking a cigar and a newish Corvette pulls into the parking lot. Out steps a gorgeous woman (27 maybe), wearing spray-painted on jeans, and a halter top that wasn't halting much. She goes to the door, taps on it and waits. Maybe 30 seconds later a guy comes to the door and opens it for her. Now I didn't time it or nothin' but I know by how long it takes me to smoke a cigar that she was in there maybe 45 minutes. She leaves the hotel, looking somewhat mussed up; gets into her Corvette and leaves. Now one of two things happened. She was either a call girl (the first one I've ever seen; at least that I know of); or she was in the fashion business and was modeling the most amazing halter tops available. My money is on the first. What do y'all think?